Get Real, For Real

Have you ever been told to “Get Real?”  Ever ask yourself what it means?  Usually, when we use the expression, what we are really saying is that the world is a pretty tough place, or that life is hard, or that a goal is unachievable.  “Get Real” is a command we issue to get others in line with our learning, accept our judgments, and face “the facts.”  But just what are these “facts,” and where do they come from?  Let’s take a moment to honestly and carefully consider the beliefs in which we place such trust and faith.

The world I see is real

This myth is the delusion most central to our self-deception, and when honestly examined, is also quite easy to disprove.  Even if we only consider the material world, can you really claim to fully perceive it with your two eyes?  Would you be willing to gamble that all of the collective human eyes throughout human history have perceived the totality of the material world? And is not perception, by its very nature limited?  Is it not true that two people, even when instructed to concentrate on the same activity with their senses, will frequently describe quite different versions of what happened? Ask yourself which statement is more honest: the world I see is the real world or the world I see is the world I see.  With an answer so obvious, why do we place so much faith in the world we see?  The answer lies in the fallacious and enticing reasoning that this core belief supports.

Because the world I see is real, I can understand it

This belief is incredibly comforting, and disproving it in no means devalues our spectacular accomplishments in science and the technology which right now is enabling me to communicate this message to you and countless others. Science and Technology have enabled tremendous progress. But science does not result in understanding anything, and while it can disprove some things and predict others with great power, it results not in knowledge of the truth, but rather in increasingly refined questions. Given that to understand means to “perceive the intended meaning of,” then all the scientific study of the material world, and even the elegant experiments of the social sciences have failed to provide us with even the most basic understanding of the world we see. From studying the world we see, have we come to understand why there seems to be hunger, war, famine, or disease? Why we experience pain or hardships? Birth, aging, death or time? Ask yourself which statement is more honest: I understand the world I see or I do not understand the world I see.

Because the world I see is real, I can control it

Even more tempting for some than the comfort of understanding the world we see is the belief that we can control it. This one is incredibly hard to let go of, since it is partially true. After all, am I not directing my behavior right now as my brain orders my fingers to press the keys to express the words generated in my mind? Couldn’t we all agree that some things we control and some things we don’t? The problem with placing our faith in Myth #3 is not that we do not have choices, or that we cannot take actions, or even that we cannot predict, to some extent, the effects of those actions on the world we see or other people. The problem is our failure to recognize that the only difference between partial control and lack of control is symantics. Ask yourself which statement is more honest: I control the world I see or I do not control the world I see.

Fact 4: Because the world I see is real, I can find happiness in it 

Having cracked open some of the fundamental fallacies on which our society is built, we come to the ultimate deception of the world we see- that it offers us happiness. Did you ever have the experience as a child of wanting a certain toy badly, believing so deeply in your heart that this toy was going to be so amazing that it would make you happy forever? Maybe it was expensive or maybe you couldn’t have it on the day you wanted it, and it seemed your life was over? That you just might die if you didn’t get it, that you would do anything for it? Do you also remember getting the toy, and that vague and uncomfortable feeling afterwards that while enjoyable, something about the toy wasn’t quite what you’d expected? For many of us, this is early evidence that we have been deceived by something within – a thought that tells us that something is wrong, and that attainment of this toy is the answer to that something.   Later, many of us encounter this wrong thought again and again as we pursue things in the world we see that we are sure are going to make us happy.

A Course In Miracles tells us that this thought that tells us something is wrong is the ego. According to the text: “Everything that the ego tells you that you need will hurt you. For although it urges you again and again to get, it leaves you nothing. Therefore, ask not of yourselves what you need, for you do not know, and your advice unto yourself will hurt you. For what you think you need will merely serve to tighten up your world against the light, and render you unwilling to question the value that this world can really hold for you.”

In Lesson 24, we are told: “In no situation which arises do you realize the outcome that would make you happy. Therefore you have no guide to appropriate action, and no way of judging the results. What you do is determined by your perception of the situation, and that perception is wrong. It is inevitable, then, that you will not serve your own best interests. If you realized that you do not perceive your own best interests, you could be taught what they are. But in the presence of your conviction that you do know what they are, you cannot learn.”

So how do we free ourselves of these ego myths? First, we must admit, out loud, and as frequently as possible, how little we know. This opens a space in our mind for truth to enter. Next, we must ask for help to set aside what we think we know and be shown the truth. It matters not to what or whom you ask. Then, we must listen to our thoughts throughout the day, paying close attention to our judgments (which tell us what we think we understand), motives (which tell us what we think we can control), and wishes (which tell us what we think will make us happy). We share them with others, that we may hear them more clearly for ourselves, and through their sharing, give them purpose. As we take these actions, the unreliable world we see begins to be replaced by certain truth, complete freedom, and present joy, which somehow we have found within ourselves. And we begin to get real, for real.